I always make it a point to learn the names of people with whom I am in contact: Rosa, the milk lady. José, the watchman at the gate. David, the guy who charges me $1.25 to swim at the pool. I then try to use their name the next time I see them and I am almost invariably greeted with a big smile. I've used this as a life lesson with our kids, saying, "Treat everyone as a person. He is 'José', not the security guard." A good lesson for all, or so I thought, until about a month ago, we had a Peruvian pastor speak to our missionary team about cultural mistakes we make. He pointed out that missionaries often greet Peruvians by their first names, which implies a close relationship. When one doesn't exist, it strikes the Peruvian as too intimate and makes them feel awkward. Could that be true? After 14 years in Peru I've been repeating this cultural error, and not only that, but with an air of moral superiority? Too intimate? In a culture where you kiss strangers when greeting and one packs into city buses smashed together, bodies pressing against unfamiliar bodies?
Amy has an adult English class where they use the Bible to teach English and discuss spiritual things. She decided to ask her students if they agreed with what the pastor had said. Yes. So now we have yet another cultural hurdle to clear: We have to figure out when to use one's first name and when to refer to them as simply, 'Señor' or 'Hermana'.
